Monday, May 14, 2007
AHHHHHHH!!!!!!
oh what a day! A maths was fine, do-able but 27 marks out of that 80 = BYE BYE! yeh, hopefully i can pass at get at least a B4? i don't know, i never pass a maths at all for the whole of sec 3 and i hope this time round i will. i think i forgotten all the formulas that i was taught in sec 3. bleah! ok tmr is paper 2 and i'm not sure if i can do well. i bet functions, matrices, integration, quadratic functions, indices, surds, logarithm, TRIGO and P&C will definitely come out. yeh, sucks lah. anyway i'm giving up on P&C already. yeh. english oral was crap lah, i did so badly and i almost cried during the conversation ok. i had mental block and i just couldn't think of anything to say. wth! it kind of spoilt my mood. SB! AB! BALLET!!! argh~
why can't i just do what i want. sometimes i wonder why is our passion being controlled by money? everything in our life revovles around money and it sucks. does that mean that only the rich can achieve their goals? i don't know what's wrong with me, i suddenly feel so heavy and down. i'm no longer so bright and cheerful.
is it true that those who always appear strong are normally the weakest? i'm getting hit by everything so easily. i want to be happy! rahhh! i feel like punching something but i can't bring myself to do it. i feel like shouting but nothing comes out of my mouth. is it because i'm too weak? i guess i think too highly of myself. i always think that i can help others but i always cannot help myself. the biggest enemy in life is yourself. as long as i defeat myself, i'll be able to succeed. but its so hard and tiring. i can't help but give up because its just too painful to be put down again after working so hard. i just don't see the point of working so hard, it doesn't really matter. rahhh~
i have a very strong feeling that tmr's paper will suck, but i don't wish it to be that case. i want to do well, but my mind just don't allow me to? yeh, i can't bring myself to practice. all i can do now is pray hard. pray that i won't be nervous and have mental block.
if i get to paint a picture, the picture will be at the beach. i will be sitting down alone staring at the clouds and imagining myself dancing on the clouds. AND i will have a smile on my face. sometimes i just like to sit down alone with nobody, no noise, just me alone and then stare at the blue blue sky. feel the breeze blowing away my stress and my worries, allowing me to feel much lighter and happier.
i can't wait for wednesday to come!
~WHY~
----------------JJ Tan H.O.W in the W.O.W --------------------
bubbles left at
9:37 pm
o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o
