Wednesday, May 30, 2007
HEY!
it has been quite a long time since i last blogged. yeh, so its confirmed that i'm not going to shanghai. nevermind, i guess right now the most important thing to me is my O level. i hope that opportunities will knock at my door again. yeh, so now i have to sacrifice something in order to live a steady and safe life. haha. i will not give up! go go go Jia Jia! now i shall officially be all of your costume manager! haha, i'll help get all the costumes! don't worry, i will still keep myself involve in SDG!
2 days to camp and i'm very excited! la la la, i feel so happy during all the dry- runs. thanks a lot ex cos! the camp is going to be so fun! weeeee~ haha, i hope everyone will be bonded during the camp! i know we will! yay! i have meeting tmr and i'm looking forward to it! yay!
Weeee, i have to start studying, i guess i can only do that after the camp, i am determine to work hard! i have to cut my aggregate score by 50% so a lot of hard work has to be put in! i can do it! go go go!
OH OH OH, I HAVE MY NEW BIKE! yay, i'm so happy and so fascinated by it! i love my bike! i just love it! its rocks man! haha, weeeeeee, feel the wind!
VISION+PASSION+ACTION=SUCCESS!
~i have accepted the fact~
-------------------------------- JJTan H.O.W in the W.O.W ------------------------------
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Wednesday, May 16, 2007
BOO!
YAY! its marking day! finally i get to rest after those horrible papers! ha ha, so yesterday's paper really did suck, ha ha. i was so angry with myself for not doing the trigo question first, for taking the diameter as the radius, for not doing the parts after the 'show' question and for being so stupid! if i didn't make such mistakes, i would have gotten 10 more marks! oh my gosh, thanks to me, myself and I! anyway, its over so no point crying over spilt milk. yeh, ha ha.
my mum said i became darker and she don't really want me to go under the hot sun. bleah, i don't care, i like it and i'm going! ha ha, anyway its my own skin so i can tan myself as much as i want! ha ha, whoo hoo~ yeh ok thanks a lot "MARIA" ! ha ha, don't know what is stone but know what is computer. ha ha, and you never prepare my breakfast today! send you back to china! ha ha. my stones are cool, they can "jump" on the sea water! ha ha, jealous?
alright, so i know that i flunk my mid-years, so means extra mugging to be done after marking days! i must i must start studying on friday. the hardest thing to do is to pick yourself up, so i shall pick myself up against all odds and move on with life! i will! i'm already at my lowest point, so i can only go up and move on with life! yes yes, i will and i must. O levels is just a stepping stone in my life, many more to come! yeh, ok i feel like i have grown so much after this mid years. i guess i really woke up? i really want to do well for O level! so mugging officially starts this friday! GO GO GO!
~whoo hoo~
------------------ JJ Tan H.O.W in the W.O.W. -------------------
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Monday, May 14, 2007
AHHHHHHH!!!!!!
oh what a day! A maths was fine, do-able but 27 marks out of that 80 = BYE BYE! yeh, hopefully i can pass at get at least a B4? i don't know, i never pass a maths at all for the whole of sec 3 and i hope this time round i will. i think i forgotten all the formulas that i was taught in sec 3. bleah! ok tmr is paper 2 and i'm not sure if i can do well. i bet functions, matrices, integration, quadratic functions, indices, surds, logarithm, TRIGO and P&C will definitely come out. yeh, sucks lah. anyway i'm giving up on P&C already. yeh. english oral was crap lah, i did so badly and i almost cried during the conversation ok. i had mental block and i just couldn't think of anything to say. wth! it kind of spoilt my mood. SB! AB! BALLET!!! argh~
why can't i just do what i want. sometimes i wonder why is our passion being controlled by money? everything in our life revovles around money and it sucks. does that mean that only the rich can achieve their goals? i don't know what's wrong with me, i suddenly feel so heavy and down. i'm no longer so bright and cheerful.
is it true that those who always appear strong are normally the weakest? i'm getting hit by everything so easily. i want to be happy! rahhh! i feel like punching something but i can't bring myself to do it. i feel like shouting but nothing comes out of my mouth. is it because i'm too weak? i guess i think too highly of myself. i always think that i can help others but i always cannot help myself. the biggest enemy in life is yourself. as long as i defeat myself, i'll be able to succeed. but its so hard and tiring. i can't help but give up because its just too painful to be put down again after working so hard. i just don't see the point of working so hard, it doesn't really matter. rahhh~
i have a very strong feeling that tmr's paper will suck, but i don't wish it to be that case. i want to do well, but my mind just don't allow me to? yeh, i can't bring myself to practice. all i can do now is pray hard. pray that i won't be nervous and have mental block.
if i get to paint a picture, the picture will be at the beach. i will be sitting down alone staring at the clouds and imagining myself dancing on the clouds. AND i will have a smile on my face. sometimes i just like to sit down alone with nobody, no noise, just me alone and then stare at the blue blue sky. feel the breeze blowing away my stress and my worries, allowing me to feel much lighter and happier.
i can't wait for wednesday to come!
~WHY~
----------------JJ Tan H.O.W in the W.O.W --------------------
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Friday, May 11, 2007
YO!
bleahhh~ MYE! driving me crazy man! guess i started studying a little too late. wait, not a little, very late! ha ha, so i kind of flunk all my papers. ha ha, maybe except for maths? ha ha, oh and paper two was fine today but thanks to me, i lost 2o marks because i didn't finish the paper! i don't know why but i was so nervous before and during the exam. my hands were trembling? yeh, and i couldn't draw my locus properly lah. i spent 20 to 30 mins just on that stupid locus question! bleah~ i was so angry with myself that i kept banging the table. oh and i kept TSK-ing, ha ha, not forgetting talking to myself! ha ha, sorry Daryl, guess i talked too loud and it affected you? Sorry! my heart was beating so fast and i felt so breathless! oh my, ha ha, i never ever felt so nervous for an e maths paper before! i crushed my paper in frustration, so it was rather loud. ha ha, i think i was the nosiest girl during the exam lah. ha ha.
oh yes, yesterday's core lit paper two was horrible! i can't even smell F9! it's that bad ok. i even had time to stare into space and plan my schedule for the time after exam. ha ha. i did the paper with much anger because the night before i read through lime-tree bower and when i was doing the paper, i couldn't remember any of my points! bleah, and section A was worse, i actually handed in a crashed before paper. ha ha, so funny. bleah.
hope that my a maths papers will be fine, plus its the last two already, so i hope i will end my last ever mid -year exam in kc with a good note. english oral should be fine, not much to worry for.
i think i can spot chapters and questions very well. ha ha, so far i spotted all the chapters. YAY! HOWEVER, i didn't study those that i spotted! WOW! except for ss, the rest i didn't study those chapters i spotted. i just knew that they will come out lah, but i just didn't care i guess. or maybe i just didn't believe my gut feel. bleah, should have listen to myself! fine, i shall burn my june holidays with ballet and books!!!
i can't wait for exams to be over! i swear i'll exercise till i drop! ha ha, i feel like going to ECP! i wanna run run run! exercise! oh and i can't wait for my bike to come! wooo hooo~ yay! hey B2, i'll be able to cycle with you after i get my bike! woo hoo! yay. i guess, i have thought through my problems and am fine already? yeh, i really feel thankful for all my friends and some of my teachers for giving me the support and listening ear. yeh, i guess its not really troubling me anymore. ha ha, good thing yeh? ha ha, i have learn to look and concentrate on the positive things and not care about the negative stuff so much. anyway, my life is controlled by me, i make the final decision to the path in my life. external influences will only aid me to my decision, they cannot force me or decide for me, whatmore they have their own life to worry for. yay!
its not easy to lead a happy life, yet everyone wants to take up that challenge. well me too, anything we go through is worth it, that's how we learn to treasure our life even more. i don't think its greedy to keep seeking for more happiness, cause that's what brightens our life. The pursuit of happiness will never end, it will continue forever, cause that's the challenge that i decided to accept in life. we live to be happy that's why!
~It's my life~
------------------------ JJ TAN H.O.W in the W.O.W ------------------------
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