Thursday, September 14, 2006
hi everyone, i'm back again!
ok i must say i'm in a super ultra mega bad mood today! ahhhhh, like what the hell, i'm so pissed with the teachers. ok not all, but some. firstly, this teacher ( shall not mention her name ) saw me during chinese period. ok, ZF didn't come today so some of us went down to the foyer to do our zuo wen. Then, in the midst of laughing and cracking jokes, she came. She said to me in chinese " ay, your councillors haven't hand in the form ah?" then i was like " huh?... oh." and just gave a black look. then she said " haiyo, why like that ?" and came towards me, man i was totally like blurr about this. right, so i told her i need 4 more forms for the councillors and she said while taking out the forms " WAH! i didn't know councillors also drag until so long!" like what the hell, how am i suppose to know the deadline and how am i suppose to know whether they are suppose to give to me or her. At the very start, i wasn't the one who collected the forms from her and she didn't say a word about the returning of consent forms to me, so how in the world am i suppose to know? You think i'm a superwoman is it? Wow, thank you for the compliment but i'm not. Like hello, councillors are also humans right, we are not perfect you know and we cannot read your mind too! AHHH, spoil my mood! ok whatever, that's not the worst. i was waiting for ally to come down to the canteen i waited quite long lah so i decided to go up and find her, ok found her but yeh she was busy lah so i just stood beside her and cheryl. Yeah, ok i wanted to go to the washroom and i don't like to go in when someone i don't know is in there so i waited since the other one ran out of toilet paper. ok and the ppl inside took so long that i saw ms w walking towards the black box. alright i was showing my social graces, so i waved and she waved back. ha ha, nothing much right but after she took a few steps forward, she realised that it was me so she took that few steps back. She asked, " aren't you in sec 3 ?" i said ya and she continued, " aren't you in drama club ?" i said the same thing, ya. " aren't you suppose to go for the syf workshop ?" ok so i explained, " oh because i missed the first one and the second and third i couldn't come because of trinity so i thought since i missed so many so just don't go." She became like angry and said, " but who gave you the permission to not come? it's a workshop and this is cca you know, so you are getting zero zero zero, you won't get cca points." Ok, i was blurr again, like huh what is this so i just said, " oh but i won't be involve in syf because my mum don't allow." and she continued, " the workshop doesn't mean a place for you in the syf. so what are you going to do about it ?" ok i have no choice but to say i'll go, and she walk away so i just said sorry lah. Man, like what the hell, how am i suppose to know its compulsory when no one came to me to tell me i have to go. She herself also didn't tell me or tell someone to tell me that i am suppose to go. hey, what is this ? like i am suppose to know its compulsory when no one tells me anything? So i'm getting zeros without knowing and not getting cca points for not knowing that i'm suppose to go? Why do they always assume things? Teachers ask us not to always assume, but here they are assuming that WE students should know what WE have to do without letting US know. WOW, why is she like using that kind of ' why you don't know ' tone and look while talking to me. what, is it because of emdd that you are treating me this way? hey, this is not right ok, its always us who get the shit from you all ok. Ahhh, i'm exploding, why are they like this? It's always our badge getting all the nonsense ok, i'm not happy with this ok, really! i'm not being myself because of a lot things, i'm so packed with everything and here are all the teachers thinking that we only and i mean only thier things to do when we are actually very busy already. They always give the excuse that they have no time, like we have time also? ahhhh, i just feel like letting go all the responsibility and just be myself. Just be me, the me that i love and feel comfortable with. i'm so .... fake now, so not myself, and i feel disgusted. i don't like to be this way, i'm already very stress and they are still adding on every single day. This week is horrible, errrgh so unhappy and pissed. ok, i'm feeling really awful, nobody understand how i feel. ( PLEASE DON'T TELL ME THAT YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL BECAUSE I KNOW FOR MYSELF THAT ONLY I WILL UNDERSTAND THIS FEELING! DON'T ASSUME! ) How i wish i'll be back to that lame and happy me without feeling awkward. how i wish i'll be that playful girl who likes to venture around doing the things she enjoys and not be so restricted. how i wish i'll stay happy forever!
i'm sorry to say this but please don't come and encourage me about this because i don't like it! i just wanna let out my anger and i don't like it when someone comes to me and say all the ' i know how you feel' or the ' but you must understand that the teachers....' so please don't encourage me about this matter! i know i'll need encouragement at times but not now.
--------- J J Tan H.O.W in the W.O.W --------
bubbles left at
8:50 pm
o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o